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Thread #: 1284

Supar Compression

HitScan

Tue Jan 8 15:33:16 2002

Check this steaming load out:

http://www.zeosync.com/flash/pressrelease.htm

Back so soon? Haven't left? Let's have a look:

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. - January 7, 2001 - ZeoSync Corp., a Florida-based scientific research company, today announced that it has succeeded in reducing the expression of practically random information sequences. Although currently demonstrating its technology on very small bit strings, ZeoSync expects to overcome the existing temporal restraints of its technology and optimize its algorithms to lead to significant changes in how data is stored and transmitted.

Oooooh. This does not bode well does it. They say they’ve done this great thing, and yet it only works on “very small bit strings” What is very small? 128 bits? 32 bits? 8?
“Existing temporal restraints” is fucking genius. This says that even if it does work, it might compress that neat-o 5-minute movie of your kid taking his first steps in time for him to show his grandkids. Bravo ZeoSync. Nice Silicon Valley name you have there too.

Existing compression technologies are currently dependent upon the mapping and encoding of redundantly occurring mathematical structures, which are limited in application to single or several pass reduction. ZeoSync's approach to the encoding of practically random sequences is expected to evolve into the reduction of already reduced information across many reduction iterations, producing a previously unattainable reduction capability.

Can you say meaningless doubletalk? It sounds like when a n00b tries to zip up a zip file, trying to get it down to one byte or some other ingenious file compression attempt.

ZeoSync intentionally randomizes naturally occurring patterns to form entropy-like random sequences through its patent pending technology known as Zero Space Tuner™. Once randomized, ZeoSync's BinaryAccelerator™ encodes these singular-bit-variance strings within complex combinatorial series to result in massively reduced BitPerfect™ equivalents. The combined TunerAccelerator™ is expected to be commercially available during 2003.

What the fuck ever. Between all the marketing brewhaha (3 trademarked “technologies” in this paragraph alone) and a term like “singular-bit-variance strings” you have to wonder who the hell wrote this tripe. I see that term and I envision strings with only 1 bit different. That makes tons of sense doesn’t it. Sounds like a whacked out Huffman encoding scheme on crack and speed, with a dran-o chaser.

According to Peter St. George, founder and CEO of ZeoSync and lead developer of the technology: "What we've developed is a new plateau in communications theory. Through the manipulation of binary information and translation to complex multidimensional mathematical entities, we are expecting to produce the enormous capacity of analogue signaling, with the benefit of the noise free integrity of digital communications. We perceive this advancement as a significant breakthrough to the historical limitations of digital communications as it was originally detailed by Dr. Claude Shannon in his treatise on Information Theory." [C.E. Shannon. A Mathematical Theory of Communication. Bell System Technical Journal, 27:379-423, 623-656, 1948]

Bold line 1: Pure marketdroid speak. Means nothing.
Bold Ital: I’m pretty sure the guy was high when he wrote this line. It’s mind bending! I only wish I had the time, patience, and background to tear into that line of marketspeak as it so truly deserves. If only…
Bold Non-Ital: Hey! I’ve read a book. Now you will think I am at least as smart as this guy, because I read his book and now I’ve used the word “treatise”

Current technologies that enable the compression of data for transmission and storage are generally limited to compression ratios of ten-to-one. ZeoSync's Zero Space Tuner™ and BinaryAccelerator™ solutions, once fully developed, will offer compression ratios that are anticipated to approach the hundreds-to-one range.

I tell you, I never tire of seeing Zero Space Tuner and BinaryAccelerator. Whoever came up with those == winnar.
Bold Line: Oops. Not exactly done yet. So…. It doesn’t exactly work. At all.

ZeoSync has developed the TunerAccelerator™ in conjunction with some traditional state-of-the-art compression methodologies. This work includes the advancement of Fractals, Wavelets, DCT, FFT, Subband Coding, and Acoustic Compression that utilizes synthetic instruments. These are methods that are derived from classical physics and statistical mechanics and quantum theory, and at the highest level, this mathematical breakthrough has enabled two classical scientific methods to be improved, Huffman Compression and Arithmetic Compression, both industry standards for the past fifty years.

Well I’ll be damned. I mentioned Huffman encoding earlier before I even read this paragraph. Also notice the buzzword density of this paragraph. I wish I had the time to “rank” them by buzzword-content ratio. I think this one would win. Big.
Acoustic compression. Has a nice ring to it right? I’m genuinely curious how that’s supposed to make your porn mpgs smaller. Really.

All of these traditional methods are being enhanced by ZeoSync through collaboration with top experts from Harvard University, MIT, University of California at Berkley, Stanford University, University of Florida, University of Michigan, Florida Atlantic University, Warsaw Polytechnic, Moscow State University and Nankin and Peking Universities in China, Johannes Kepler University in Lintz Austria, and the University of Arkansas, among others.

I wish I had the resources to look into these claims. I find 13 colleges somewhat “suspect”…

There’s some more, but I’ve gone on long enough, and I’ve had a shitty morning, but I do want to emphasize this last line:

This press release may contain forward-looking statements. Investors are cautioned that such forward-looking statements involve risks and uncertainties, including, without limitation, financing, completion of technology development, product demand, competition, and other risks and uncertainties.

That’s particularly fitting in this case, don’t you think? ;)
DrPizza

Tue Jan 8 15:54:49 2002

brewhaha

"brouhaha"

HitScan

Tue Jan 8 16:45:46 2002

from DrPizza posted at 7:54 am on Jan. 8, 2002

brewhaha

"brouhaha"

I stand corrected.
Magus

Tue Jan 8 17:18:05 2002

Indeed!

Heh, if they want compression....

World's best compression: del *.*

HitScan

Tue Jan 8 20:03:32 2002

unix comes with a great compressor. It's called "rm". makes things so small, you can't even see the filename!
DuffMan

Tue Jan 8 22:15:52 2002

I think they need to compress their press releases!
DeAthe

Wed Jan 9 00:09:32 2002

cat /Fucking/* /Retards/* >Fucktards.txt | grep loser
Imitation Gruel

Wed Jan 9 00:18:52 2002

I've never heard of a lot of those schools. This seems to be as big a load as that bullshit from Xtrem a while back.

Oh dear, looks like Xtrem's website is down. :rolleyes: Bugger. :rolleyes:

OscarWilde

Wed Jan 9 02:11:12 2002

You want compression?

take a fucking cold shower?

god damn makes a 12 inch penis down to the size of a half inch mushroom!

thats compression right there.

OscarWilde

Wed Jan 9 02:12:06 2002

dude you must have been fucking bored if you had to go out of your way to discuss something that i doubt any of us even heard till your brought it up here.
Imitation Gruel

Wed Jan 9 02:21:49 2002

god damn makes a 12 inch penis down to the size of a half inch mushroom!

You're only 12 inches?

Shorty.

Heh. In all seriousness, this is true. A cold shower really gets the heat off the body; and this means the body redistributes the heat; so if there's one area that's been getting a lot of heat (hint hint), it...won't anymore. Then...shrinkage.

HitScan

Wed Jan 9 02:51:38 2002

dude you must have been fucking bored if you had to go out of your way to discuss something that i doubt any of us even heard till your brought it up here.

Yeah, well, I was fucking bored, heh. I just like going on about marketspeak and BS. As for not hearing about it, am I the only one who reads (or admits to reading ;) ) Slashdot from time to time? ;)

Basically, they're fucking with people. If it was real, and was fast, it would be amazing. But it's not and it isn't, so it sucks. So there's pretty much my entire post in 25-26 words. Feel free to skip the big one and read those two lines again. :biggrin:

DrPizza

Wed Jan 9 14:25:46 2002

from Imitation Gruel posted at 12:18 am on Jan. 9, 2002

I've never heard of a lot of those schools. This seems to be as big a load as that bullshit from Xtrem a while back.

Oh dear, looks like Xtrem's website is down. :rolleyes: Bugger. :rolleyes:


Xtrem had some virtue, in that I'd still really like a case like their supposed cases.
AllYorBaseRBelong2Us

Wed Jan 9 19:43:03 2002

Xtrem was/is an empty FUD engine.  It caught some of the more educated Mac Users into it's web of belief.

HitScan

Fri Jan 11 12:55:12 2002

I just thought I'd follow up on this since it's my thread:

http://www.newscientist.com/news/news.jsp?id=ns99991780

Vaishampayan says this provides little to go on: "I've read it several times over and it refuses to make sense."

Ouch. heh.