Thu Jan 24 06:51:04 2002

The Poem

[color=red]I am the very model of a modern Major-General,[/color]
[color=blue]I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,[/color]
[color=purple]I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical,[/color]
[color=yellow]From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;[/color]
[color=magenta]I'm very well acquainted too with matters mathematical,[/color]
[color=gold]I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,[/color]
[color=black]About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news---[/color]
[color=green]With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse. [/color]

[color=red]I'm very good at integral and differential calculus,[/color]
[color=purple]I know the scientific names of beings animalculous;[/color]
[color=orange]In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,[/color]
[color=magenta]I am the very model of a modern Major-General. [/color]

[color=pink]I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's,[/color]
[color=purple]I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox,[/color]
[color=blue]I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus,[/color]
[color=magenta]In conics I can floor peculiarities parablous.[/color]
[color=black]I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies,[/color]
[color=red]I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes,[/color]
[color=orange]Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore,[/color]
[color=red]And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore. [/color]

[color=pink]Then I can write a washing bill in Balylonic cuneiform,[/color]
[color=blue]And tell you every detail of Caractacus's uniform;[/color]
[color=red]In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,[/color]
[color=purple]I am the very model of a modern Major-General. [/color]

[color=orange]In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin",[/color]
[color=blue]When I can tell at sight a chassepôt rifle from a javelin,[/color]
[color=orange]When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at,[/color]
[color=yellow]And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat",[/color]
[color=gold]When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,[/color]
[color=red]When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery:[/color]
[color=pink]In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy,[/color]
[color=blue]You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee--- [/color]

[color=red]For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury,[/color]
[color=green]Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century;[/color]
[color=black]But still in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,[/color]
[color=purple]I am the very model of a modern Major-General[/color]

Enjoy.

(Edited by Imitation Gruel at 10:53 pm on Jan. 23, 2002)

Thu Jan 24 10:39:21 2002

Thu Jan 24 11:05:21 2002

Thu Jan 24 14:25:33 2002

[size=1](If I laugh any harder inside I am going to rupture something. This needs attention, hehehe)[/size]

Thu Jan 24 21:06:21 2002

Thu Jan 24 21:45:05 2002